https://www.tumblr.com/audio_file/spellslots/167788914744/tumblr_ozupg5gRKM1ti3ttq?plead=please-dont-download-this-or-our-lawyers-wont-let-us-host-audio
https://greywatch.tumblr.com/post/180693703824/audio_player_iframe/greywatch/tumblr_ozupg5gRKM1ti3ttq?audio_file=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tumblr.com%2Faudio_file%2Fspellslots%2F167788914744%2Ftumblr_ozupg5gRKM1ti3ttq

amnestylodge:

i figured that, seeing as i am Tumblr User Spellslots, i might as well put together the saga of jenkins and the spell slots. it’s a thrilling adventure, beginning with episode 12 and ending with episode 55. smell ya later.

theglowqueen:

Matt Mercer as DM: “You bisect the enemy, spilling it’s entrails across the floor. You bathe in its blood as you hear the pieces of its body hit the floor with a wet squelch behind you *makes squelching noise*”

Griffin McElroy as DM: “And then you just cut the dang thing in half. Are you happy? You literally cannot ‘non-lethally’ cut something in half. It’s super dead now”

this podcast was a mistake -griffin probably

thatgirlonstage:

theroseeatsribs:

  • “No, this is one of those moments where you learn to take care of your shit.”
  • “ It’s a very tense situation" “That’s true. It’s almost like I’ve designed it to be like that.”
  • “Oh, a minus one. Then you die. God, Travis. In trying to discern his fanciness your nose just starts bleeding and you fall over-”
  • “You and the box both drink POSION. And you survive but the box has died.”
  • “There’s a stapler in here- does anyone want the fucking stapler?”
  • “You run up and tear the box open. It explodes. You die.”
  • “I can’t believe you all went with the red shirts, but fine- You’re all wearing different shades of red.”
  • “Now, Griffin, I need you to describe both scenes simultaneously.” “I won’t do that. I’m very very tired.”
  • “So the end of that sentence that you cut off was ‘and so I won’t be putting up with any shit today,’ but the problem is that I already have.”
  • “okay you give them the medicine of not being on fire anymore”
  • “i don’t remember giving you a GUN.”
  • *drops dice* *has a meltdown*
  • the total helpless exhaustion when justin texts him a descriptor of taako’s t-rex transmutation
  • the whole bit about the pillow exoskeleton suit
  • infinite bag of boys

Please let’s not forget

  • “I eat it” “What the fuck”