So this has been stuck in my head ever since I heard it three days ago.
this is the polar opposite of Everybody Knows Shits Fucked
i didn’t know this til i looked up the video on youtube, but this dude is a super cool and accomplished musician! his name is Rushad Eggleston–wikipedia describes him as “an innovative musician who has changed the way the cello is played,“ but according to his personal website he’s a “cello goblin & otherworldly jester currently touring earth”
not to be dramatic but when he chuckled i fell in love with this man. i’m a whole entire lesbian but this is the cutest human being on the entire planet. i’d marry him. that’s a controversial statement and all my fellow lesbians are free to come into my home and shred my shoes or put me in gay jail deep in the redwood forest. i accept that. i accept whatever judgement must be made upon me by the laws of this gay land but know that i will stand before that jury of my peers with no regret and i will accept whatever is done to me in the name of love for this Tofu-Loving Cello Goblin
If you have billions of dollars it shouldn’t be a crime to steal from you. You’ve got enough money that your security should be your own responsibility and anyone who manages to swipe from your hoard deserves applause for besting a supervillain
Over a billion and you reach the social connotations that dragons have, as in stealing from you is considered a Challenge rather than a Crime
Vader: I used to not understand why people cared so much about their dumb children until I found out I have a kid. If anything bad were to happen to Luke I would kill everyone in this room and then myself
I’ve come to realize that this is literally exactly what happened in return of the jedi and I can’t believe I didn’t make that connection sooner
like this isn’t a joke the way I meant it to be, it’s full on canon
i'll apple your turnover 